IFS Clinical Protocol: The 6 F’s, Unburdening, and the Art of Self-Led Healing

Category: Somatic Therapy / IFS | Level: Jaguar (West) — Medicine Wheel

The Architecture of an IFS Session

Internal Family Systems therapy is simultaneously one of the most structured and most organic therapeutic modalities. It is structured in the sense that it follows a precise sequence of steps — the 6 F’s — that guide the clinician and client from initial contact with a part through the completion of healing. It is organic in the sense that the process is led not by the therapist but by the client’s Self and the client’s parts. The therapist facilitates. Self heals.

This article provides a detailed, step-by-step clinical protocol for IFS therapy, drawing primarily on Richard Schwartz’s foundational texts (Schwartz, 1995; Schwartz & Sweezy, 2020) and Frank Anderson’s Internal Family Systems Skills Training Manual (Anderson, Sweezy, & Schwartz, 2017). It is written for practitioners who want to understand not just what IFS does but how it does it — the specific movements, questions, decision points, and clinical considerations that constitute a complete IFS session.

Before the 6 F’s: Establishing Self-Energy

The prerequisite for IFS work is Self-leadership — the client must be in a state of calm, curious awareness sufficient to relate to their parts from a non-reactive, compassionate position. If the client is blended with a part (identified with it, experiencing its emotions as their own, unable to observe it from a distance), the 6 F’s cannot proceed. The first clinical task is always: is the client in Self?

Detecting Self vs. Blending

Anderson (2017) provides a practical guide for detecting Self-energy versus blending:

Signs of Self-energy:

The client can describe their experience with some distance (“I notice a part of me that feels anxious”)
The client’s tone is curious, compassionate, or calm when discussing the part
The client’s body is relatively relaxed, breathing normally
The client can maintain dual awareness — awareness of the part and awareness of the present moment
The client reports the qualities of the 8 C’s: Calm, Curiosity, Compassion, Clarity, Confidence, Courage, Creativity, Connectedness

Signs of blending:

The client speaks as the part rather than about the part (“I’m terrified” vs. “I notice a terrified part”)
The client’s tone matches the part’s emotion — anxious, angry, numb, desperate
The client’s body reflects the part’s state — tense, collapsed, agitated, frozen
The client cannot observe the experience; they are consumed by it
The client loses awareness of the present moment — they are “in” the memory or the feeling

Unblending Techniques

When blending is detected, the therapist helps the client unblend before proceeding. Common unblending techniques:

Direct Request: “Can you ask that part to step back just a little, so you can get to know it?” This simple request — phrased to the part, not against the part — often produces immediate separation. The part is not told to go away; it is asked to create just enough space for Self to emerge.

Physical Externalization: “Where do you feel that part in your body? Can you put your hand there?” Physical contact with the body location of the part helps differentiate Self (the one placing the hand) from the part (the sensation being touched).

Somatic Grounding: “Feel your feet on the floor. Feel the weight of your body in the chair. Notice the temperature of the air on your skin.” Grounding in present-moment sensation activates the ventral vagal state and reduces the dominance of the part’s emotional activation.

The Room Exercise: “Imagine you are sitting across from this part in a room. What does it look like? How far away is it?” Creating spatial distance between Self and the part in the imaginal realm produces psychological distance.

Noticing: “Just notice that you are noticing. The one who notices is Self.” This meta-cognitive move — drawing attention to the act of awareness itself — activates the observer position, which is always Self.

The 6 F’s: Step by Step

F1: Find

What: Locate the part in the body, in the mind’s eye, or in the felt sense.

How: The therapist asks the client to notice what is happening inside — what thoughts, emotions, sensations, or images are present. The client identifies a part to work with. This may be a part that is activated in the moment (“I feel anxious right now”), a part related to a presenting issue (“The part that makes me overeat”), or a part that emerged during the previous session.

Key question: “Where do you notice that part in or around your body?”

The somatic location is critical. It grounds the work in the body and prevents intellectualization. Common locations:

Chest: anxiety, grief, heartache
Stomach: fear, dread, nausea
Throat: suppressed expression, choking, silence
Shoulders/jaw: control, bracing, protection
Head: thinking parts, analyzing, worrying
Back: burden, carrying others’ pain
Pelvis: shame, sexuality, power

Clinical note: If the client cannot find the part in the body, the part may be working through thoughts (“I hear a critical voice in my head”) or through images (“I see a small child hiding in a corner”). All of these are valid entry points.

F2: Focus

What: Turn attention toward the part with interested attention.

How: Once the part is located, the therapist directs the client to focus on it — to bring it into the center of awareness. This is not staring at it with intensity but turning toward it with the quality of attention one would give to a friend who has something important to say.

Key question: “Can you focus on that part? Just be with it.”

Clinical note: At this point, the therapist checks for Self-energy again. The act of focusing on the part may activate it, causing blending. If the client shifts from observing the part to being consumed by the part’s emotion, the therapist must pause and facilitate unblending before continuing.

F3: Flesh Out

What: Learn about the part — its appearance, age, feelings, role, and history.

How: The therapist guides the client to get to know the part through direct internal communication. The client asks the part questions and reports what they receive — words, images, feelings, knowings.

Key questions:

“What does this part look like?”
“How old is it?”
“What is it feeling?”
“What is its role? What does it do for you?”
“What is it afraid would happen if it stopped doing its job?”
“How long has it been doing this?”

Clinical note: Fleshing out often reveals the part’s protective function. A critical inner voice (Manager) may reveal that it criticizes the person to prevent them from taking risks that could lead to rejection. A numbing part (Firefighter) may reveal that it dissociates to prevent the person from feeling the Exile’s pain. Understanding the protective function is essential — it transforms the relationship between Self and the part from adversarial to collaborative.

F4: Feel Toward (how do you feel toward this part?)

What: Assess the client’s current relationship to the part. This is the most important diagnostic step in IFS.

How: The therapist asks: “How do you feel toward this part?” This question reveals whether Self or another part is in the lead.

Self-energy responses: Curiosity, compassion, warmth, gratitude, tenderness, openness, interest. These indicate that Self is present and available to lead the healing work.

Part responses: Frustration, irritation, impatience, fear, judgment, desire to get rid of it, desire to fix it. These indicate that another part is blended — typically a Manager that judges the target part or wants to control the process.

Critical decision point: If the client reports anything other than the 8 C’s (or something close to them), the therapist does not proceed with the original target part. Instead, the therapist turns attention to the part that is interfering — the one that feels frustrated, afraid, or judgmental. This new part becomes the focus: “Can you notice the part that feels frustrated with this anxious part? Can you get to know it? What is it afraid of?”

This recursive process — working with the parts that block access to other parts — is one of IFS’s most distinctive features. The system reveals itself layer by layer. Protectors must be addressed before the parts they protect can be reached.

F5: BeFriend

What: Develop a relationship between Self and the part.

How: Once the client feels genuinely curious and compassionate toward the part (F4 confirmed Self-energy), they are guided to communicate this to the part. The client speaks to the part internally: “I see you. I appreciate what you’ve been doing for me. I understand why you do what you do.”

Key questions to ask the part:

“What do you want me to know?”
“What are you most afraid of?”
“What do you need from me?”
“How long have you been doing this job?”
“Do you like this job, or would you rather do something else?”

Clinical note: The befriending process is inherently relational. The part has been operating in isolation — doing its protective job without recognition, appreciation, or support. When Self turns toward the part with genuine compassion and interest, the part often has an emotional response: relief, tears, gratitude, or initially, suspicion (“Why are you being nice to me now? You’ve ignored me for thirty years”).

The therapist supports this relational process without directing it. The therapist’s role is to help the client stay in Self while navigating the part’s responses. If the part’s responses activate blending (the client is pulled into the part’s fear or grief), the therapist facilitates unblending and returns to the befriending process.

F6: Fear (what is the part afraid would happen if it stopped protecting?)

What: Identify the part’s core fear — the catastrophe it believes will occur if it relaxes its protective strategy.

How: The therapist guides the client to ask the part directly: “What are you afraid would happen if you stopped doing your job?”

Common protector fears:

“If I stop being vigilant, something terrible will happen”
“If I stop controlling, everything will fall apart”
“If I stop numbing, the pain will destroy us”
“If I stop criticizing you, you’ll become weak and get hurt”
“If I let you feel that, you’ll never stop crying”

Clinical note: The part’s fear almost always points to the Exile it is protecting. “If I stop numbing, the pain will destroy us” points to an Exile carrying unbearable pain. “If I let you feel that, you’ll never stop crying” points to an Exile carrying unprocessed grief. The 6th F is the doorway to the Exile.

Working with Protectors Before Exiles

This is the cardinal rule of IFS: never go to the Exile until the protectors give permission. Protectors exist for a reason. They installed themselves during a time when the person genuinely could not handle the Exile’s pain — when the person was a child, without resources, without support, without the capacity to process overwhelming experience.

The protectors do not know that circumstances have changed. They do not know that the person is now an adult with resources, with a therapist, with Self-energy. They are still operating on the original threat assessment: “This pain is too much. If it surfaces, the system will be destroyed.”

The clinician’s task is to update the protectors. This is done through the befriending process (F5) and the fear exploration (F6), followed by a direct request:

“I appreciate everything you’ve done to protect us. I understand why you’ve been doing this job. And I want you to know that I (Self) am here now. I can handle what’s underneath. Would you be willing to step back — just a little — so I can help the part you’ve been protecting? You can step back in if it gets to be too much.”

When protectors trust Self enough to step back, access to the Exile becomes possible. When protectors do not trust Self — when they test, resist, bargain, or refuse — the clinician works with the protector’s distrust rather than overriding it. The distrust is valid. It must be earned, not demanded.

The Unburdening Process

When protectors step back and Self can access the Exile, the unburdening process begins. This is the core healing event in IFS — the moment when the Exile releases the beliefs, emotions, and body sensations it has carried since the original wounding.

Step 1: Witness the Exile’s Experience

Self turns toward the Exile with full attention and compassion. The Exile is invited to show Self what happened — to share its memories, its feelings, its beliefs, its pain. Self witnesses without flinching, without fixing, without minimizing. The witnessing itself is therapeutic. Many Exiles have been waiting years — decades — for someone to see what happened to them and respond with compassion.

Key question: “What does this part want you to see or know about what happened to it?”

The witnessing often produces intense emotion in the client — tears, grief, rage, terror. The therapist monitors for blending: is the client witnessing the Exile’s pain (Self is present) or experiencing it directly (blended with the Exile)? If blending occurs, the therapist facilitates unblending: “Can you notice that you are separate from this part? Can you hold it with compassion rather than becoming it?”

Step 2: Retrieve the Exile

After witnessing, Self is guided to retrieve the Exile from the traumatic scene. This is an imaginal process: the client visualizes entering the memory, approaching the young part, and removing it from the scene of the wounding.

Key question: “Does this part want to stay in that scene, or would it like to come with you to somewhere safe?”

Most Exiles want to leave. Self takes the Exile to a safe place — real or imagined — where the Exile can feel protected and cared for. This retrieval is symbolically and neurologically significant: it literally separates the Exile from its traumatic context, disrupting the association between the part and the scene.

Step 3: Unburden

Once the Exile is in a safe place, Self invites it to release its burdens — the beliefs, emotions, and body sensations it has carried.

Key questions:

“What did this part take on from that experience? What beliefs, feelings, or body sensations has it been carrying?”
Common burdens: “I am worthless,” “I am unlovable,” “It was my fault,” “The world is dangerous,” “I am alone”
“Is this part ready to let go of these burdens? Does it want to release them?”

If the Exile is ready, Self facilitates the release. The Exile is invited to let the burdens go through one of the elements: earth (bury them), water (wash them away), fire (burn them), air (release them into the wind), or light (let them dissolve into light). The choice of element is the Exile’s, not the therapist’s.

This is the moment of unburdening — the release of what the Exile has carried. Clients typically report dramatic somatic shifts: weight lifting from the chest, warmth spreading through the body, deep breathing, tears of relief, a sense of lightness or spaciousness.

Step 4: Invite New Qualities

After releasing the burdens, the Exile is invited to take on new qualities — whatever it needs. “What would this part like to take in, now that it has released those burdens?” Common responses: love, safety, worthiness, connection, play, joy, freedom.

The Exile is invited to absorb these qualities through the same elemental channel: light filling the body, warm water washing through, earth’s stability grounding the part, air bringing freedom and lightness.

Step 5: Update the Protectors

After the Exile is unburdened, the protectors (Managers and Firefighters) must be informed that the danger they were protecting against has been resolved. Self communicates to the protectors: “The part you’ve been protecting has been healed. The pain you’ve been guarding against has been released. You don’t have to do this job anymore.”

The protectors are then invited to choose a new role — one that they actually want. The perfectionist Manager might choose to become a part that pursues excellence for joy rather than fear. The numbing Firefighter might choose to become a part that provides rest and relaxation rather than dissociation.

Contraindications and Safety

IFS is generally safe, but specific clinical situations require caution:

Active psychosis: Parts work requires the capacity to maintain an observer perspective. Active psychotic symptoms (hallucinations, delusions) may make it impossible to distinguish between parts and psychotic phenomena. IFS is not recommended during active psychosis.

Severe dissociation: Clients with Dissociative Identity Disorder (DID) or Other Specified Dissociative Disorder (OSDD) can benefit from IFS, but the work requires advanced training and extended stabilization. The structural dissociation model (van der Hart, Nijenhuis, & Steele, 2006) should inform the treatment plan. Unburdening should not be attempted until the system has sufficient internal communication and affect regulation.

Insufficient Self-energy: If the client cannot access even minimal Self-energy — if every attempt to observe a part results in blending — the system may not be ready for direct parts work. The clinician should focus on Self-energy cultivation through mindfulness, grounding, and resource building before attempting the 6 F’s.

Suicidal crisis: A client in acute suicidal crisis needs crisis intervention, not parts work. However, once stabilized, IFS can effectively address the suicidal part — understanding it as a Firefighter attempting to escape unbearable pain, befriending it, and eventually addressing the Exile whose pain drives the suicidal ideation.

Active substance use: Active intoxication or heavy substance use interferes with the capacity for Self-energy. However, IFS is effective for addressing the parts system that drives addiction (see the companion article on IFS for trauma, addiction, and eating disorders).

The Therapist’s Self-Leadership

Anderson (2017) emphasizes that the therapist’s Self-leadership is the single most important factor in IFS therapy. The therapist must be able to:

Remain in Self when the client’s parts activate the therapist’s own parts (countertransference in IFS terms is understood as the therapist’s parts getting triggered by the client’s parts)
Trust the client’s process without needing to control or direct it
Hold the entirety of the client’s internal system with equal compassion — including the parts the client hates, fears, or wants to eliminate
Tolerate the uncertainty and nonlinearity of the healing process
Model Self-energy through presence, tone, pacing, and relational attunement

The therapist who has done their own IFS work — who knows their own parts, has worked with their own Exiles, has developed their own Self-leadership capacity — brings a qualitatively different presence to the therapeutic relationship. The client’s nervous system detects this presence. In polyvagal terms, the therapist’s ventral vagal state co-regulates the client’s nervous system, creating the conditions for the client’s own Self to emerge.

The Four Directions in IFS Practice

Serpent (South): The body is the primary compass in IFS. Every step of the 6 F’s includes somatic tracking. The location of the part in the body, the somatic shifts during befriending, the physical release during unburdening — the Serpent’s wisdom guides the work through the flesh.

Jaguar (West): The Exile’s domain. The descent into the cave of one’s own suffering — witnessing what happened, feeling the original pain, facing the truth of one’s wounding — is the Jaguar’s journey. IFS unburdening is the Jaguar’s medicine: transforming the wound into wisdom.

Hummingbird (North): The soul retrieval dimension. Retrieving the Exile from the traumatic scene and inviting it to take on new qualities parallels the shamanic practice of soul retrieval — recovering the parts of the soul that were lost through trauma and restoring their gifts to the whole.

Eagle (East): Self is the Eagle’s perspective — the witnessing consciousness that observes all parts with compassion and clarity, without being identified with any of them. The Eagle’s gift in IFS is the capacity to hold the entire internal system in awareness, seeing each part’s role in the larger pattern, and knowing that beneath all the parts, there is an undamaged wholeness.

References

Anderson, F. G., Sweezy, M., & Schwartz, R. C. (2017). Internal Family Systems Skills Training Manual: Trauma-Informed Treatment for Anxiety, Depression, PTSD & Substance Abuse. PESI Publishing.

Dana, D. (2018). The Polyvagal Theory in Therapy: Engaging the Rhythm of Regulation. W. W. Norton.

Porges, S. W. (2011). The Polyvagal Theory: Neurophysiological Foundations of Emotions, Attachment, Communication, and Self-Regulation. W. W. Norton.

Schwartz, R. C. (1995). Internal Family Systems Therapy. Guilford Press.

Schwartz, R. C., & Sweezy, M. (2020). Internal Family Systems Therapy (2nd ed.). Guilford Press.

Sweezy, M., & Ziskind, E. L. (Eds.). (2013). Internal Family Systems Therapy: New Dimensions. Routledge.

van der Hart, O., Nijenhuis, E. R. S., & Steele, K. (2006). The Haunted Self: Structural Dissociation and the Treatment of Chronic Traumatization. W. W. Norton.

IFS Clinical Protocol: The 6 F's, Unburdening, and the Art of Self-Led Healing